Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Do you ever feel like...

... it's hard to enjoy the moment because you feel as though the phase of your life that you are currently in is already over, and you're living in a premature state of nostalgia? I remember this time about two years ago when I was walking between two very tall buildings, and I could see a glorious stretch of blue sky, and I was so gloriously, deliriously happy - not because anything special had happened, but only because at that moment I forgave myself all my flaws, all my silly mistakes; and I thought, ah, if I could only be just this way with myself all the time, the way one might think about a normally distant lover who plans a spontaneous night of romance.

But in the very same moment I felt sad, because I feared that I, just like one would fear the lover, would never be quite so kind again.

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